The Lost Art of Listening to Yourself
By Justice N.Anand Venkatesh

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The airport is like a stage where we can see all sorts of human behavior. I was at the airport early the other day, and I watched a young guy who was also there way before his flight. But instead of just chilling, he was fidgeting, tapping on his phone, making calls, and constantly looking at the gate. It made me think about how hard it is for us to just be alone with our thoughts, even for a few minutes. We live in a time where being alone and not doing anything feels almost impossible.

It’s like we are running away from ourselves, always trying to fill the quiet with noise and every free moment with our screens. We have become strangers to our own minds, scared of what we might think about if we let ourselves be still. The gadgets that were supposed to connect us have actually made us feel more disconnected from our own inner thoughts. Being bored, which used to be normal, is now seen as something to avoid at all costs.

But what are we really running from? Maybe it’s the discomfort of our own unfiltered thoughts, our raw emotions, or the tough questions that pop up when things get quiet. When we don’t have distractions, we have to face ourselves—our hopes, regrets, worries, and dreams. For many, this is not fun, so we grab our phones, turn on music, or start scrolling. We feel restless not because the world is bad, but because we don’t know how to be comfortable with ourselves.

Boredom, in particular, has become almost a dirty word in our fast-paced world. But what if boredom is not something to fear, but something to value? When we are bored, our minds are free to wander, to make new connections, and to imagine possibilities we might never have considered if we were always busy. Boredom can be a doorway to creativity and self-discovery, a quiet space where our deepest ideas and feelings can rise to the surface. In trying so hard to avoid boredom, we may be shutting ourselves off from the very experiences that make us more thoughtful, creative, and truly alive.

This restlessness isn’t just a personal thing; it’s happening everywhere. We are taught to think that being busy means we are valuable, and that every moment has to be productive or fun. Being idle, which used to be a good time for creativity, is now seen as a waste of time. But some of the best ideas came when people were just alone and bored. When our minds can wander, we often find great ideas that we wouldn’t have found if we were always busy.

If we can’t be alone with ourselves, it can mess with our mental health. All the constant stimulation doesn’t leave room for thinking or dealing with our emotions. We might become less interesting people, just skimming the surface of life instead of going deep. Our relationships can suffer too, because if we can’t be present with ourselves, how can we be present with others? Our inner life starts to fall apart, and we end up lost, searching for meaning in a world full of distractions.

Will this make us crazy? Maybe not in a big way, but there’s something a little crazy about never really knowing yourself, never stopping to ask, “Who am I when all the noise is gone?” It’s a small but important loss—a feeling of emptiness, less creativity, and feeling distant from our own feelings.

But there’s a way to fix this, and it starts with learning to enjoy being alone again. It begins with reclaiming the lost art of solitude. To sit quietly and let ourselves be bored without panicking helps us understand our own minds.

It’s in these quiet moments that we remember what it means to be human and not just someone who consumes things, but someone who thinks, dreams, and wonders. Being mindful, just being present, can turn restlessness into peace. Setting limits with technology, making time for reflection, and being okay with silence are brave things to do in a world that is afraid of them.

Next time we are waiting somewhere—at the airport, in line, or at the end of the day, let us try not to escape into distractions. Instead, let us just sit with ourselves. Listen to our own thoughts. Let boredom lead to creativity and self- understanding. We might find that the person we have been avoiding is the person we need to meet the most.

In a world that is always rushing, the most radical thing we can do is to stop, breathe, and just be. It is in these quiet, sometimes boring moments that we rediscover our sanity, our creativity, and our humanity—“one silent minute at a time”.

Justice N.Anand Venkatesh Judge High Court Madras

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